What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

I vibrated my dogs shock collar while it was eating my other dog’s food and now it won’t eat. How do I fix this problem?

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

Why are so many Communist Chinese on Quora despite it being illegal for Chinese citizens to use Quora?

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

Why do narcissists devour so much sugar (candy, ice cream, donuts, etc., in huge amounts at a time)?

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

As a woman, what would be you response to a male friend’s offer of a full body massage?

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

Is Matt Gaetz qualified to be Attorney General of the United States?

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

Is a man over 50 not married no kids a red flag?

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

What are the pros and cons of arranged marriages?

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

Here's The Top 10 Most Expensive Pokémon Cards in Destined Rivals - IGN

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

Make Nazis afraid again!

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

5 food combinations that naturally boost gut health - Times of India

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

What is the best way to get my wife to become a hotwife?

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

TEXT:

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Why do I feel worthless most of the time?

At least until the peyote kicks in ...